cancer????

Leukemia, melanoma, lymphoma, astrocytoma-- what the hell do these words mean? These are all big, scary words that all come down to the same thing; cancer. If you or someone close to you, such as a relative or friend, has been diagnosed with cancer, you know that it is a troubling and worrisome experience. If you haven't had to deal with a close one going through cancer, well then lucky you! I for one, have known of cancer my entire life. My grandma Sande passed away when I was one from metastatic breast cancer, also known as stage IV breast cancer. My other grandma, Theresa, also passed away from metastatic breast cancer when I was four. My great grandma, was a thirty year breast cancer survivor. My mom has had basic skin cancer. My dad had invasive well differentiated squamous cell carcinoma. My very first dog was put down because of cancer. My dear grandpa just recently passed away from chronic emphysema. And now my mom once again has skin cancer, but not just your basic skin cancer, she has metastatic melanoma. Out of all of the skin cancers, this is by far the worst kind. This cancer often requires surgery, treatments, and medications; the results of this disease could be fatal. Since her diagnosis she has had the tumor, which is located on her ankle, partially removed.

Throughout my blog I will give weekly updates on my mom and her and our family's progress through this journey.

After my moms diagnosis, I have been trying to find ways to deal and cope with the news. I mean what are you supposed to do and how are you supposed to feel when your mom is diagnosed with cancer? I have found a blog written by a woman named Ann Marie Giannino-Otis. She has been battling breast cancer and she writes about everything; she speaks of her journey with cancer, her family, friends of hers that are also going through a battle, and everything else you could think of. Her blog is named 'Stupid Dumb Breast Cancer' if that gives you any indication about how she feels towards this disease. A piece of writing of hers that really caught my eye was one she wrote about things people who aren't struggling with cancer do not understand.

"I hate looking at myself in the mirror between the scars and chest I do not recognize me I can not look.  It's a cancer thing you wouldn't understand.

My body has changed so much I hardly can wrap my head around this rapid change nor do I want to. It's a cancer thing you wouldn't understand.

I have scans and blood work coming up and it makes me crazy with worry. It's a cancer thing you wouldn't understand.

I do not sleep at all even with medication. It's a cancer thing you wouldn't understand."

These are just some of the things she speaks about that healthy, cancer free people just simply don't understand. Going through and reading some of these incomprehensible things really made me realize what these people go through; it makes me worry for my mom. How am I supposed to support and help my mom through this when I don't even understand what she is going through? These questions I asked myseld made me do some research on how to help my sweet mom through this tough time. An article I found talks about the 6 best ways to help a loved one who has cancer. One thing that stood out to me in this article, was one of the best ways to help someone with cancer, is to take care of yourself as well. I have noticed since all this news came about, that I have slightly neglected taking care of myself. I have been so focused on my momma that I haven't been getting enough sleep, I haven't been eating right, I have not been focusing on my school work, and I haven't been treating my friends and roommates with the respect and love that I should. I'm not saying I regret doing what I've been doing for my mom, I just need to focus on my well-being as well as hers. I personally believe bonding through laughter is one of the best ways to make a person feel better. "Finally, it sounds cliché, but honestly, laughter really is the best medicine. After my own surgery, my sister had me laughing so hard that I literally thought I would split a stitch. I know I’d have peed my pants, had I not left the hospital with a catheter. It hurt so horribly every time she cracked a joke, but to this day I actually look back on those days with fondness — what positive, special memories I have of that post-op period, thanks to her."